So your friend invited you to a Derby party. You’ve never ridden a horse, but you have overfed a cousin’s pony at a wedding in India. Close enough.
This is your no-prior-knowledge guide to America’s most over-the-top two-minute sport. You’ll go from “Wait, is this polo?” to “That colt’s got a closing stride, I’m telling you.”
📅 May 3, 2025. Mark it. Or just show up for the snacks and hat photos (latest odds & horses).
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🎩 Derby Party 101: What to Wear (Even on Zoom)
For the auntie-core crew: Go big or go home. Derby hats are basically saris for your head, elegant, bold, occasionally bedazzled (official style guide; fashion trends; more trends).
For the uncles: Think pastels, linen, bow ties, and the swagger of someone who once owned a racehorse in Chennai (probably fiction, but say it with confidence).
For literally anyone: If someone doesn’t say, “My God, that’s a choice,” you haven’t gone Derby enough.
🥃 Mint Julep 101: Cocktail Culture for the Culturally Curious
How to Make a Proper One (before you forget your middle name):
Kentucky bourbon. This is non-negotiable.
Crushed ice, aka "snow cone for grown-ups."
Muddle fresh mint + simple syrup.
Pour. Sip. Pretend you know what tannins are.
Pro tip: After two juleps, you will start using words like “colt,” “post position,” and “lineage” with no context. This is normal.
🐴 How to Sound Like a Derby Insider
Casually Drop These:
“The track looks fast today.” (No one knows what this means. Use it anyway.)
“I’m keeping an eye on the post position.” (Add a dramatic sigh.)
“That horse has incredible closing speed.” (Pause for effect. Sip slowly.)
“Honestly? I liked his Santa Anita Derby performance better.” (Nobody will challenge this.)
For the latest horses and favorites, check the 2025 Derby field.
💸 Betting for Beginners (aka Impress Without Stress)
Starter Bets:
Win = Horse finishes 1st
Place = 1st or 2nd
Show = Top 3
Across the Board = Like betting with a backup plan
Slightly Advanced:
Exacta = Predict 1st & 2nd in order (future-seeing cousin energy)
Trifecta = 1st, 2nd & 3rd - in order
Superfecta = 1st through 4th. Basically astrology, but more expensive
🐴 The Horses Everyone’s Talking About (Or Pretending To)
Key favorites:
Journalism (Post 8, 3-1): The morning-line favorite, coming off four straight wins and considered the top contender by most analysts.
Sovereignty (Post 18, 5-1): The second choice, with a strong record in prep races.
Sandman (Post 17, 6-1): Another major contender, though some experts are skeptical of his resume compared to the top two
See the latest contenders and odds.
🎟️ If You’re Actually Going to Churchill Downs (Fancy!)
Infield = Bourbon-fueled chaos (read: vibes)
Grandstands = Where people pretend to analyze stats
Millionaires Row = Where celebrities act like they care
Friday’s Kentucky Oaks = Women’s day, pink everything, actual racing
🐴 Emergency Derby One-Liners (Save These for Awkward Pauses)
“Can you believe Secretariat’s record still stands?” (It does. Iconic.)
“The julep tradition dates back to the 1800s.” (Say it while refilling yours.)
“They use over 400 roses for the winner’s garland!” (Florist flex.)
“I swear, the pre-race song makes me emotional every year.” (Hum a little "My Old Kentucky Home.")
🥳 The Weekly Chai Takeaway
The Derby is 50% horse race, 50% fashion moment, and 100% an excuse to day-drink bourbon in formalwear.
✨ Wear something dramatic.
✨ Say “post parade” at least once.
✨ Blame every wrong bet on the mint juleps.
✨ Take at least one photo where you look like you own the winning horse.
For party inspiration, check out these 25 unforgettable Derby party ideas.
Now go forth and Derby with confidence. You’re not just there to bet - you’re there to bring the chaat energy to Churchill Downs. 🐴💐🥃
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